So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
