Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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