I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Randomize
