Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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