please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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