so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
