when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
