Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
