My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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