My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
She even gives head with a lisp.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize