Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
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