you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Randomize