Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
