I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
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