This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
there is glitter all over my balls
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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