Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I need water and some morals
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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