I only kidnapped one of them. chill
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
