that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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