and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Randomize
