id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Randomize
