just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
