I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
