Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
