ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
