You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize
