Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
