Plan B is the new Plan A
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
