were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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