Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
