On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Randomize