The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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