I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize