In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize