you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
