Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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