Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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