Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
