it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
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