I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
