White coat. Heels.
he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I had to cum in my sink.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
