You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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