Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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