real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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