I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
I am mentally ready for anal.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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