Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Just invented taco cereal.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Randomize
