i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Randomize
