You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
