you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize