i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
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