As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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