If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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