we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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