Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
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